Larson Institute of Self-Mastery » Person’s Name

10 Effective Ways to Remember Names

Guest — Fri, 27 May 2011 07:02:54 +0000

Author: Scott Ginsberg

Sigmund Freud says “a person’s name is the single context of human memory most apt to be forgotten.” Feelings of embarrassment and social ineptitude are conveyed through this forgetfulness, and unfortunately, the problem persists daily. The ability to remember names is an important skill that gives you an advantage in social and business settings. However, the way you associate and remember names is based on your learning style and personality type.

The following list of ten effective ways to remember names combines visual, aural and strategic techniques. Once you find the best fit for you, it will become easier to avoid muttering the most awkward and impersonal sentence in the English language: “Hey you!”

Repetition, Repetition, Repetition

As soon as you hear their name, repeat it back to the person. “It’s good to finally meet you, Karen–I hear you’re the expert on mufflers.”

If you don’t do this, you will forget her name within ten seconds of meeting her. Also be sure to repeat the name aloud in the beginning, during and at the end of the conversation. This will allow you to widen various areas of your memory circuit.

“That’s a great story Stephanie!” “Wow Tony, you obviously know your hockey.” If you speak the name, hear the name, and listen to yourself say the name, you will remember it.

Inquiry

The number one rule in interpersonal communication is to show a genuine interest in the other person. So, ask your new colleague to explain the personal significance of their name. Ask if they go by a nickname. Inquire about the culture from which their name was derived. The spelling question is also effective. Even if Dave or Bob is only spelled one way you can always ask if they prefer “Dave,” “David,” “Bobby” or “Robert.”

In so doing, you show them you care about them as a person. You also transform their name from an arbitrary fact into a meaningful representation of them. Ultimately, you will flatter them and make them feel appreciated.

Dramatize Faces

You probably remember faces better than you remember names. Great! This will only make it easier when you dramatize someone’s face and associate facial feature with their name. For example, if their nose or hair is particularly memorable, make a connection using alliteration with their name. Brian has bright red hair. Lucy has a long nose.

The trick is to make your associations and dramatizations memorable and interesting. Remember, that which is exaggerated and ridiculous is memorable.

Forget About You

“Did I give him the ‘cold fish’ handshake?” “Did I even look into her eyes?” “Do you think she noticed the logo on my company briefcase?” If you try too hard to make a good first impression, odds are you will have no idea to whom you make a good first impression to!

So don’t think about yourself! Forget about you! Concentrate on them. When you become too self-conscious and nervous during the moment of introduction, it will interfere with your memory.

Write Them Down

If you are a visual learner, write down the name of the person. This is a flawless method to remember. Most networking functions and meetings take place where tables, pens and paper are available.

Throughout the conversation, look down at the name in front of you, and then look at the person. Maria. Then look at the name again. Maria. Then look at the person again. Maria. You’ll never forget.

The additional benefit when you do this, unbeknownst to you, is that at least one other person in your group will see you write the name down. Talk about a good first impression!

Inner Monologue

Imagine you’ve already used Samantha’s name during the conversation. You seem to have it committed to memory. Then again, you don’t want to overuse her name aurally. Even if a person’s name is the sweetest sound they will ever hear, you don’t want to make it too obvious that you use the repetition trick.

Fortunately, there are countless opportunities during the conversation to quickly say the name to yourself while you look at their face: while they get a pen, while they take a drink, while they get something out of their desk, while they laugh at your hilarious joke.

It only takes a few seconds to look at someone and silently think to yourself, “Samantha. Samantha. Samantha.” Don’t worry; you won’t miss anything if you choose to do this at the appropriate times.

Introduce Someone Else

“Have you met my coworker Patty?” you ask the nameless person. “I don’t believe I have,” he says, “My name is Roger. It’s nice to meet you Patty.” Roger. That’s his name! You thought it was Antonio! Thank God you introduced him to someone else or you would be floating up the eponymous creek.

Furthermore, if you introduce someone you just met to another person, it allows you to: take control of the conversation, show your willingness to encourage connections and expand someone else’s network of colleagues.

Listen and Look for Name Freebies

More often than not, you won’t be the only person who knows the name of your new colleague. This means that other people will say their name, and you will be reminded. No charge. All you have to do is pay attention.

Also remember to keep your eyes open for subtle, visual reminders such as business cards, receipts, nametags, jewelry, table tents and personal papers. Without getting too nosey, it will be easy to identify these “name freebies” that paint you out of your memory corners.

These ten effective techniques to remember names will be helpful to cross the chasm between you and a potential colleague or associate. When you identify and amplify someone’s name, you won’t suffer a loss of face. Ultimately, your interactions and conversations will become more personal and comfortable.

Practice. Practice. Practice. That’s the hard part. But over time you will learn how these different techniques for name memory will work best for you.

Attitude. Attitude. Attitude. That’s the easy part. However, while practice enhances your name memory over time, it only takes a few seconds to decide to change your attitude. Don’t yourself that you can’t remember names. In fact, from this moment on, you are no longer bad with names. Combine this new attitude with your recently acquired skills, and you’ll never have to say “Hey you!” again.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
The last time someone forgot your name, how did that make you feel?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS…
Next weekend, go to Borders and spend an hour reading books on remembering names. Email me and let me know which ones are your favorites!

Scott Ginsberg is a professional speaker and the author of HELLO my name is Scott, The Power of Approachability and How To Be That Guy. He helps people MAXIMIZE their personal and professional approachability – one conversation at a time. To book Scott for your next association meeting, conference or corporate event, contact Front Porch Productions at 314/256-1800 or http://www.hellomynameisscott.com.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Scott_Ginsberg

Marketing Yourself, Part 2 – Name Recognition

Gary N. Larson — Tue, 19 Oct 2010 21:40:00 +0000

(Note: This is Part 2 of a four part series on Marketing Yourself)

Part of any marketing campaign is developing name recognition. Professional marketers do this by getting their product name in front of people as often as possible and in as many ways as possible. Think of how many ways the Coca-Cola Company gets the name Coke in front of you. It’s everywhere it seems. I remember being in a small village in China, in the middle of nowhere, and there was the Coke logo on a sign outside a small shop. Coca-Cola has done a great job of developing name recognition.

In a similar way you need to develop name recognition. You need to get your name and face out there in front of people on a regular basis. My tips today are slanted more to the corporate world but the ideas can be applied to other situations. Here are three simple ways to do develop name recognition:

1. Step Outside of the Box (physically and mentally)

We’ve all heard the term, “Think Outside the Box.” Well, we also need to Step Outside the Box, mentally and physically. You can no longer hide behind your PCs or camp out in your cubicles or offices. It’s easy to spend the entire day at our desks. Get out of the office. Be seen and be heard. Attend meetings. Visit other people in their environment and see what exactly it is they do. Find out what their concerns and frustrations are. You will be amazed at what you learn.

2. Communicate Regularly

Communicate regularly with your boss and with your bosses’ boss. This means more than just memos. Use the phone or meet one-on-one with them. Try to arrange to meet with each of them each month. Do this by having something to report or show them. Show them you are interested in two things – making their jobs easier and increasing the bottom line of the business. This face-time with them is extremely important when it comes to building name recognition.

3. Participate in Company Events

Many organizations have events such as annual picnics, Christmas parties or golf tournaments. Make it a point to be to these events and actively participate. They sometimes seem like insignificant activities but that’s not the case. What these activities provide are opportunities to rub shoulders with and get to know people of all levels of the organization. You get to know them and they get to know you. Plus you are seen as a team player, as part of the corporate culture.

Each of these techniques help you build name recognition within your group or organization. When your name is recognized in a positive light by the decision makers, this can only be for your benefit.

(Look for the next two articles in this four-part series on Marketing Yourself)

6 Tips to Develop Self-Confidence with Others

Gary N. Larson — Thu, 02 Sep 2010 10:35:04 +0000

Are you the kind of person who struggles in social settings? Are you shy and tend to stand in the background? Do you run from social situations because they are scary and uncomfortable for you?

You may have seen other people that seem to project self-confidence. They appear to have no problem in any social situation. They make friends easily and seem to be able to connect with others. How do they do it?

Today I’m going to share 6 ways to help you develop confidence with others. If you follow these six simple tips you will begin to feel more confident with yourself and more comfortable in social settings. There is no magic here, just six simple tips. Here they are:

Tip Number 1: Be a Front-Row-Seater

When you attend any function such as a meeting, seminar, or class where there is a large group of people, what is the first row of seats that fill up? The back row! It seems like most everyone wants to be in the back, out of the way, unobtrusive, and unnoticed. They want to just slide into the back unobserved. You need to change that attitude. You need to be a front-row-seater.

Let’s face it; outgoing, confident people don’t sit on the back row. You will find those people sitting on the front row and that’s where you should be also. It’s a signal of your willingness to jump in and be a part of the situation. Sitting on the front row may be uncomfortable at first but it puts you right up there with the important people. Another benefit is that you are better able to contribute to the meeting or discussion than if you are sitting in the back. So that’s my first suggestion is to be a front-row-seater.

Tip Number 2: Make eye contact

Have you noticed that shy people rarely look you in the eye? When you walk past them they tend to avoid you and look the other way. It’s very uncomfortable for them to look you in the eye. This usually happens because they are afraid to engage you, meaning if they acknowledge you in any way then they may have to actually say something to you. It’s easier and safer to pretend they don’t see you.

Maybe you are that kind of person and have that same problem. Maybe you don’t even notice it. Pay attention to how you react when you pass someone on the sidewalk or in the hallway at work. Do you look the other person in the eye and make eye contact? If not then you have some work to do.

If you want to convey the message that you are a self-assured and confident person then you need to practice looking others in the eye. Don’t be afraid of the other person. Acknowledge that you see they are there. I’m not saying you should stare them down or that it should be some sort of confrontation, but that it should be a friendly gaze into the other person’s eye.

Tip Number 3: Walk 25% faster

I’ve noticed that there are some people who walk extremely slow. It’s amazing how slow some people walk. I don’t even know how they can walk so slowly. My body doesn’t even go that slow. They just sort of plod along as if they were pulling a 200 pound weight behind them, dragging from one place to the next. It’s frustrating sometimes to get stuck behind slow moving people! When a snail has to tell you to get out of road, then you know you’re going too slow!

When you see someone like this, what are your thoughts? I don’t know about you but I have a hard time not thinking of them in negative terms, like they are aimlessly going nowhere. I’m ashamed to admit that the term “loser” crosses my mind a time or two.

But when you see someone walking briskly with their shoulders straight, their head up and they are moving forward as if nothing is going to stop them, you get the impression that they are a person that has confidence in themselves and are going places in life.

So my tip is to walk 25% faster than you normally walk. When I say 25% faster, I don’t mean that you should get a pedometer and measure exactly your walking speed and then increase it by 25 %. What I mean is for you to make sure you walk briskly with confidence, like you have somewhere important to be. Walk like you have meaning and direction in your life.

Tip Number 4: Speak Up!

You may not be aware of it but many times when we speak to each other we speak in barely audible tones. Have you noticed that people who are confident and seem to be going somewhere speak up, speak clearly and speak loudly? Again it’s a message of confidence. It’s a message of “I’m not afraid to speak up. I have a healthy self-image. I have something important to say and I’m not just going to mumble it or say something under my breath, but I’m going to speak up and be heard!” So speak up!

Tip Number 5: Smile and smile big

There are some people who seem to carry the whole world on their shoulders. They have a perpetual cloud over their head and a sour expression on their face. They make you wonder what kind of sad, miserable life they live.

Then there are those who go around with a permanent smile on their face. They are friendly and confident and cheerful. They look you in the eye and say “Hello!”

Think about which kind of people you like to be around. Are they the ones that always have a grim look on their face or those that have a smile? Let’s face it, who wants to hang around a grump? We would much rather be around those that are happy and cheerful. It’s normal and natural.

So smile and smile big! Show others that you are happy and that you are glad to see them. Show them that you are pleased with who you are and where you are going in life.

Tip Number 6: Call the other person by name

It’s been said many times that the sweetest word in the English language is a person’s own name. People love it when somebody uses their name.

Let’s be honest. When someone takes the time to learn your name and remembers it the next time they meet you, aren’t you impressed? Don’t you instantly like that person? And when someone who should know your name can’t seem to recall it, doesn’t your opinion of them drop by about 1000 percent? The non-verbal message is that you are not important enough for them to learn your name. We are all human and have a need to feel important. When someone remembers your name you feel more important than when someone can’t remember your name.

We can have impact and power with other people when we take the trouble to learn their name and use it then next time we see them.

So that’s my message for today. If you want to develop more confidence with others and feel more comfortable in social settings, follow these 6 simple tips.