Larson Institute of Self-Mastery » Human Nature http://larsoninstitute.com Master Your Mind, Body, Money and Relationships Tue, 20 Dec 2011 20:54:33 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3 How to Read People http://larsoninstitute.com/2010/11/25/how-to-read-people/ http://larsoninstitute.com/2010/11/25/how-to-read-people/#comments Fri, 26 Nov 2010 03:48:04 +0000 Guest http://peopleskillscentral.com/?p=531

Reading PeopleGuest author Raman Kuppuswamy

Going deep into the merits and the ethical issues relating to reading the minds of other people can easily be dismissed on the short ground that it is not a progressive idea. In a way, it is true also because of the highly competitive and merciless situation that prevails in every field. In fact, reading people’s minds bestows many benefits. It is definitely possible also but the techniques must be practiced consistently so that your conclusions are near-perfect. Some of the techniques are discussed here.

It is an agreed fact that by observing the body language and eye movements of a person, you can find out what the person is thinking. In fact, reading the signals of the body language and eye movements is a great skill and if it is mastered, you can achieve a lot of things. Some people seem to have this skill naturally but many of us do not pay attention to the signals that emanate from other people through these things. If you want to acquire this skill, you should start paying more attention to these aspects.

- A great way to read the minds of people is to observe their eye movements. Experts have found out that if a person looks upward and to the left, he or she is making attempts to create an image. If a person looks upward and to the right, you can construe that he or she is making attempts to remember a particular image.

Another point is that nervous people or those who speak lies will not look at your eyes directly. If the person is shy or timid, even then, you can not expect the person to look at you directly.

On the other hand, confident people keep their eye contact for a longer duration. Same is the case with lovers. By watching the facial expressions also, you can make out what is brewing in the minds of people.

- If someone is trying to get close to you, they will respond positively when you move closer to them. They will remain where they are or will try to come a little closer. If they do not relish you getting closer to them, they will retract a little or move away from the scene.

- While conversing with a person, if the person agrees with you, the knees will be pointed towards you. On the contrary, if the knees are turned away from you, you can conclude that whatever you say is not acceptable to them.

Similarly, nervous or impatient people keep shifting their weight or moving their feet. If you observe a person sitting with his or her legs crossed, you can easily make out that he or she is an easy-going person.

- The head position will also help you to determine what people think. Tilted heads show that they have sympathy for you. A tilted head with a smile on the face show that he or she is a playful person or it can even be interpreted as a sign of flirting. If the person lowers the head while talking, you can be sure that he or she is trying to hide something.

- Some people will try to mirror your behavior. This shows that they are interested in you and are trying to create a relationship with you. To test this, you can make a few changes your behavior and if they also try to imitate these changes, you can be sure that they are very much interested in you.

- You should also observe the movement of arms to read a person’s mind. If the person folds or crosses his or her arms around the chest, they are trying to shield themselves from others’ influences. If they keep their feet wider with such crossed arms, these people are exhibiting their toughness. If the hands are kept on the hips, you can conclude that they are getting impatient. By keeping their arms behind, they are showing that they are not averse to discussions.

You should not become obsessed with this aspect of reading others. If you are over-zealous, others will find out that you are trying to find out what they think or attempting to read them. They will become a little rigid with you. This may spoil your relationship with people. Therefore, you should adopt a subtle approach while you try to read people.

Raman Kuppuswamy writes highly interesting and informative articles on various topics. You may kindly visit http://hubpages.com/profile/dreamdamodar and read his other articles written on many other topics.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Raman_Kuppuswamy

]]> http://larsoninstitute.com/2010/11/25/how-to-read-people/feed/ 0 How to Get Total Cooperation from Others http://larsoninstitute.com/2010/08/21/how-to-get-total-cooperation-from-others/ http://larsoninstitute.com/2010/08/21/how-to-get-total-cooperation-from-others/#comments Sat, 21 Aug 2010 10:57:47 +0000 Gary N. Larson http://peopleskillscentral.com/?p=73 Cooperation

Have you ever needed someone’s help only to find that getting it was like pulling teeth? Maybe you were going about it all wrong. Suppose there was another way to solicit help from others that would almost guarantee their total cooperation. If you are interested, then read on.

Try This Test

Try this test the next time you want someone to help you with something. It doesn’t really matter what you need help with. It can be shoveling snow, painting a fence or solving a computer problem.

Test 1: For the first test, simply ask someone to help you. Say, “Will you help me do this?” Tell them exactly what you want them to do and how to do it. You can even offer to pay them, but make it clear that all you are paying them to do is just what you want them to do. Now note what kind of cooperation you get.

Test 2: For this second test don’t just ask the other person to help you “do” something. Approach them by asking them to help you think about the job that needs to be done. Tell them you have a problem and would like their help in resolving it. Ask them what they think about the problem. Ask them for their opinion about how you are going about it. Again, note what level of cooperation you get.  

Inevitably, you will find that although you will get some level of cooperation with the first method, you will almost always get total cooperation with the second method.

A Basic Law of Human Nature

Why is it that if you are out in your yard painting your fence and you ask your neighbor, “Hey John, can you come over and help me paint my fence?” he will tell you to go take a hike?

But if you say, “John, I’m trying to paint my fence and I just don’t know if I’m doing it right. I just can’t seem to get the paint to go on very smooth. Do you have any ideas of what I’m doing wrong?” John will more than likely come over, take the paint brush out of your hand and say, “Here, let me show you how it’s done.”

The reason is simple. There is a basic law of human nature that says we are much more interested in our own problems than the problems of others. When you ask John to help you paint your fence, it is your problem. But when you ask for his advice about painting the fence, you give him a challenge to solve a problem and thus the problem becomes his.

We Need to Be Needed

Another factor involved here is the human need to feel important. By asking John for advice you gave him the feeling of importance, the feeling of being needed. We are much more willing to give of ourselves when we are being looked up to and sought out for our knowledge and skills. It is much easier to engage the brawn when the brain is involved.

This works with painting fences or running billion-dollar corporations. The next time you would like someone to do something, rather than tell them to do it, engage their brain. Let them contribute their ideas and become part of the solution to the problem and you will find them bending over backwards to help you. It’s human nature and it works every time.

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